The H1N1 “pandemic” has caused quite a stir.  Breann and I are faced with something that I have never encountered in all my 18 years of managing surrogacy cases.  All of the hospitals in San Diego are limiting the amount of people allowed in the delivery room to only 2 or 3 persons through the entire flu season which they say is until May.  Inevitably, this leaves Breann and me out.  And in some cases, both of the Intended Parents can’t be at the birth of their child either.

Needless to say, this change has caused a lot of panic for Couples and their Surrogate Moms who were counting on us being there for support and to manage anything that needs to get done.  At first I was uneasy about it, too.  Hundreds of things crossed my mind that would require our attention or facilitation.  I called the hospitals hoping they would make an exception for these special circumstances, but no one would budge.  How could they not see the importance of our being there?  I was so wrapped up in the attendance of the birth, that I lost sight of the big picture.  I took a step back and gained my perspective back.  A sense of calm set in and I’ll tell you why.

It occurred to me that we have given everyone what they need way ahead of time.  You probably think I am referring to the court orders or something tangible like that.  But I am not.  I am talking about something that goes much further back, before the Surrogate Mother and her Couple became a match.  The Surrogate Mothers in our Program are exceptional women and some of the best moms I have ever met.  I have seen them take on the Intended Parent’s quest to have a family as their own personal mission.   The Intended Parents are incredible too.  They trust us and their Surrogate Mom with the most important thing in their life.  They are in awe of their Surrogate Mom and appreciate more than words can say the gift they are receiving.  I know they truly care for her and her family.  This combination is the best foundation for a perfect outcome.

Although it is disappointing that we are unable to attend the births, we must maintain our perspective.  It is but a moment that will fade with time.  We still participated in the most significant event of their lives and that will live in our memories forever.

I have to tell you about something incredible, something truly amazing.  My blog today is a prologue to Amanda’s birth story.  Amanda’s story begins as it has for many Surrogate Mothers.  She was fortunate enough to become pregnant on her first IVF attempt and all seemed to be going along just beautifully.  Then suddenly in her 5th month of pregnancy the doctor noticed the amniotic fluid was decreasing significantly which is not good for the baby.  Week after week, the status didn’t change.  The water level just wouldn’t go up.  Finally, as we were getting near the end of November, the doctor said we needed to make plans for a premature delivery in mid to late December even though the baby wasn’t due until February.  And by December 1, Amanda was confined to bed in the hospital and we were told that the birth would occur sometime that month.  The parents made their travel plans to arrive by mid-December.  But, I had a strange feeling.  I call it strange because it was just the opposite of what the doctors were saying.  Deep in my heart I knew this baby girl was not going to arrive in December and I truly believed she would be just fine.  Obviously there was no information to support my feelings, so I knew it was my faith in God that was guiding me.  I told the Couple that I truly believed their baby was not coming in December but of course we should prepare as the doctor says.  They made their arrangements to arrive on December 23rd as the doctor said that since there has been no improvement, delivery would occur on December 30th at the latest.  Ready for the Christmas Miracle?  Early in the week before Christmas, Amanda had an ultrasound, the same type of ultrasound she had been having every week for months.  Except this time, the technician could not find anything irregular.  She reviewed the chart to ensure she was seeing the right patient, the one whose water was supposed to be low and who was at serious risk for a premature delivery.  She measured the fluid and measured the baby quite thoroughly.  And she reported that everything was normal.  Literally, the complication that had occurred fully reversed itself.  So, that day Amanda was released from the hospital as there was no indication for her to be there.  And still to this moment, the pregnancy continues normally and the little baby girl is measuring perfectly and doing somersaults in Amanda’s tummy that is once again full of water.  They say that miracles happen to those who believe.  I have always been a believer.  How about you?

Hello All,

It is unbelievable how busy we were this first week of 2010.  But all good stuff, though.  We went through a major electronics overhaul in December.  My little Acer was a work horse, but in the end it couldn’t handle the demands I put on it.  So in addition to our becoming a paperless office, I had to get a new computer.  It is always fun to get a new computer….at first!  Then you realize the work involved to get the new one up to speed.  But I must say, I love Windows 7!

Now to more important things.  Surrogacy!  My life and passion.  Well, I do have a funny story.  Brianna had her embryo transfer on New Year’s Eve.  Poor thing!  But she was quite the trooper to miss out on the celebrations with her family.  Well, as we were quietly waiting for the doctor to do the transfer, I closed my eyes and was thinking about this tremendous event and suddenly Donny Osmond’s voice starts singing “Puppy Love”.  I didn’t even notice that there was a radio in the room and until that moment, didn’t realize it was even on.  I leaned over to Brianna and asked her if she could hear the radio and we both cracked up.  What a great story it would be for the parents to tell their child that Brianna got pregnant for them while listening to Donny Osmond!  I don’t know if kids today know who he is…much less if they will!!  Let’s keep our fingers crossed for them!

We have been so lucky to find some new Surrogate Moms.  Just offering to do this, makes them the best people on this planet.  Huge thanks to all of the Surrogate Mothers who give so selflessly.

Okay, that’s my blog for this week.  Have a wonderful weekend and blessings to all.  May we have a beautiful New Year!

Check out Building Families’ Fan Page on FaceBook!!  Become a fan and post some comments.  We would love to hear from you!

Carol

Hello All,

I am going to figure out how to manage my time to write on a weekly basis.  Even if it is just a few lines.  Please feel free to e-mail me that I am not keeping up!

This is my New Year’s resolution as well as creating a FaceBook page.  So I will be visiting with many of you soon on the web.

We wish you good health and a beautiful 2010.

Carol and the Building Families’ Team