How to Tell Your Child Their Sibling is Coming… From Someone Else

 

One thing we can all agree on is that adults make most things more complicated than they need to be. If only we could maintain the easy acceptance our children have to situations. I asked two Couples how they explained their surrogacy arrangement to their children and here are their responses:

J&J already had a child, Tommy, but needed help having little Tommy’s sibling. In school, Tommy was learning how birds build nests for their eggs and their newborns so J&J saw this as an excellent opportunity to explain how Tommy’s brother would be arriving. They explained how mommy’s tummy was like a nest but it wasn’t warm enough to grow an egg so they needed the help of another mommy’s nest. And their special friend, Sarah, offered to share her nest and is keeping Tommy’s little brother safe and warm until it is time for him to be born.

Another Couple, A&D, decided that they would share their twins’ stories with them from birth. They created an album showcasing photos of when they first met their Surrogate Mother, Suzy, all the way to the day they came home from the hospital. Each night before bedtime, they took turns reading the album and they found that by the time their children began sitting in their lap and turning the pages themselves that the story became a natural event and one they came to enjoy sharing each night. Initially, they were concerned that their children would not react well to the news but saw that they actually felt the same way that their parents did….excited!! They say that the “practice” of telling the story almost nightly for nearly a year helped alot.

Thanks for sharing J&J and A&D!!!!