August 7, 2013, was an amazing day. After more than 3 months in the hospital, our first identical twins are leaving the hospital. The doctors have deemed them super healthy and super lucky to be in such good health considering their early arrival. A now weighs a whopping 6lb while his brother, M, comes in close at 5.5lb. This is a true testament to Brenda’s commitment to caring for the twins while she was pregnant.
Congratulations Shannon and Jennifer for completing two families. Shannon shared more than 200 pictures! Clearly Dennis got carried away with Carol’s camera. LOL. Jennifer shared how much she was affected by one of the pictures Carol took showing the new mom holding her hand and crying as her baby was born. Thank you both for your contribution to Building Families, these special Couples and the world.
Let’s be honest, we all love Judge Judy! Although she has a harsh tone most of the time we all value what she has to say. Watch the video below to hear what she has to say about irresponsible parenting.
My Last and Final Surrogacy
After two of my own children and then carrying two more pregnancies for a wonderful Couple, I was sure I was done with this mission in life. I had even been quoted as saying that I was retired. So what changed?
My job at Building Families, Inc. is to find appropriate Surrogate Mothers to help our Incredible Couples have the family they so richly deserve. Carol and I meet weekly to discuss the needs of the Program as well discussing the potential candidates coming in to the Program. This has been our routine for many, many years. So in 2009, as per our usual weekly meeting, Carol mentioned there a Couple but the Surrogate Mom needed to have specific qualities. We went over them and I told her I would see who may be a good candidate.
That night I was in bed mentally pouring over all of the candidates that were in process. Not one stuck out for me. My husband, Jermaine, asked me what had me in such deep thought. I gave him the Couple’s background and then described the qualities in a Surrogate Mother that Carol and I discussed were needed for this Couple. He replied quietly, “I don’t really know why you don’t see it.” I said, “See what????” with a very confused expression on my face. He said, “You are all of those things that would make the best Surrogate Mom for this Couple.” I laughed and told him he was crazy. I was in retirement, I reminded him.
But then I couldn’t sleep. I was laying there thinking…..Is he right? Am I the right Surrogate for this Couple? It had been five years since I was last pregnant and I was adamant about being done with this part of my life. Not that I didn’t enjoy my 4 pregnancies and the outcome they produced, of course! But, I had closed that chapter and couldn’t reopen that book. Or could I?
And so I called Carol and asked her if she was sitting down. She replied, “Why?” I laughed and said, “I know who should be their Surrogate Mom. Me!” You can only imagine the surprise from her end of the phone. “What? Who? What? Are you kidding?” was all she could manage at first. But finally it turned into “Okay, let’s do this.”
That was more than 3 years ago, but seems like yesterday. I will forever be grateful to my husband for having such clarity when I did not. I would have missed out on an amazing journey with my Special Couple that continues to this day.
And now, I am retired…for sure this time! – Tracy
1. Length of Time in Business – With the growth in the industry, there are more and more agencies to consider all the time. Make sure you find out how long the agency has been in business and how much experience they have.
2. References – Don’t hesitate to ask to speak to one or more of their prior surrogates. These ladies can typically give you a first hand account of their experiences. You can also ask for professional references. If an agency won’t give you referrals, you should consider that a red flag.
3. Size of the Agency – Ask how many cases they manage at one time and what is the ratio of case managers to number of cases. Determine if they meet your expectations. If you are looking for a more intimate experience, you may be more comfortable with a smaller agency.
4. Evaluations for all Parties – Determining the appropriateness of a Surrogate Mother or Intended Couple is much more than having a uterus or having a substantial bank account. Be sure the Agency you are considering has a psychological approval process as well as ensuring there is a true need for surrogacy.
5. Matching Process – The matching process varies greatly from agency to agency. Some agencies choose the match for you while others post profiles online so you can be chosen by the Intended Parents. Building Families believes in the dynamic matching process where the Surrogate Mom and Intended Parents choose each other after meeting face to face. The match is suggested after a careful review of each parties belief system along with personality traits. Be sure you choose an agency that finds your match in a way that is comfortable for you.
A final note that is worth sharing: If you ever get an uneasy feeling or any red flags are raised, pay attention to your instincts. You should always speak up for yourself and if it becomes necessary, choose a different agency.
I am always looking for affordable things to do with my kids during the summertime. Here is my personal list of the top 5 things to help you combat boredom during the summer (for little or no cost):
1. Regal Summer Movie Express – Most Regal theatres play children’s movies for $1 each person on weekday mornings. There are a couple of movies each week to choose from in most theatres. Click on this link to find one near you: http://www.regmovies.com/Movies/Summer-Movie-Express
2. Students Bowl Free – This program allows kids up to age 18 bowl one game for free each day of the summer at participating bowling alleys. Sign up online at http://coupons.bowlbrunswick.com/ballpass/.
3. Bass Pro Shops – They have free activities for families all summer long. You can learn how to fish, set up a tent, or lots of other fun outdoor tasks. Check with your local store for details.
4. Build a Fort – I don’t know why but every kid (big and small) loves a fort. Use blankets, furniture, and sheets to turn your living room into a personal kids fort. And don’t worry about the mess…leave it up for a few days. Let the kids sleep in it, eat in it, etc. They’ll love it.
5. Camp in Your Own Living Room – Set up a tent right in your own living room. If you don’t have your own tent, borrow one from a friend or neighbor. Set it up just like you were on a camping trip. Tell bedtime stories, sleep in sleeping bags, use a lantern (electric, of course) to get that full camping feeling.
Those are my summer fun activities. What are yours?
Shannon is a perfect example of someone who teaches by her actions and not just her words. She has not only been a Surrogate Mother before, she just finished her THIRD pregnancy with us! She has such a big heart and we are so appreciative of her efforts in sending new candidates our way. Thank you for all your help, Shannon, and enjoy the Knotts Soak City tickets!!
It was an exciting morning at HRC Fertility! Dr. Jane Frederick transferred two AMAZING embryos to Isabel. Join me in sending positive vibes to Isabel and her Couple!!
The California State Senate and General Assembly passed AB 926, a bill that will require just and fair compensation to women who donate their eggs to clinical research. Please click here to find out how you can help make this happen:
https://secure2.convio.net/res/site/Advocacy?pagename=homepage&page=UserAction&id=483
Another successful year for Building Families. A big Thank You to all of the wonderful people that came out to spend the day with us at our 2013 Annual Picnic. We love seeing the same faces and new ones each year. It is especially heartwarming to see the end results of our Surrogate Moms’ and our hard work. We feel blessed to have been a part of the building of so many families!!!