For many intended parents, communication is not just a preference—it’s a cornerstone of their journey. How updates are shared, how often contact occurs, who initiates discussions, and how everyone stays informed can shape the entire emotional arc of the journey.
What they need is predictability. Not rigid rules, but a mutual understanding established early on: Do we text? Video chat? Do intended parents attend appointments or wait for updates afterward? Do we want regular check-ins or milestone-only communication?
When these questions are left unasked, assumptions creep in—and mismatched expectations often follow. A surrogate might feel overwhelmed by too many messages. Intended parents might feel disconnected by too few. But when the communication plan is clarified in the earliest stages—ideally during or even before matching—everyone feels more grounded and respected.
And when handled with compassion, these conversations create more than schedules. They create comfort, connection, and a shared rhythm that sustains the relationship through each phase of the process.
